Ironically, He's Never Seen Star Wars.

I was just looking at Epic Win FTW and J crawled up on my lap, saw this picture.









He pointed at it and said, "Ball! Spase-sip ball!"

I love this kid.

At least he was honest.

We had J in the bath (or as he says, "Issa doing baff a spash!") as we did little chores around the house that are hard to do with him present. Dave and I took turns checking on him every couple of minutes--before you call CPS, our apartment is approximately 30 ft square, and it's about 3 steps from the kitchen to the bathroom. A few minutes ago, D calls to me, asking if the bathmat was wet last I checked. I replied, 'no' and went in to take a look.
There was literally a puddle. Dave asks J, "What did you do?"
J gives a little smile, and picks up a small bucket of water, and, quite dramatically, dumps it on the bathroom floor.
*facepalm*

Grampa on the brain

What do Grampa, garbage, and Christmas all have in common?

J pronounces them all the same way.
"Gappa! Gamma!"
"Wow big twuck! Issa gappa twuck."
"Gappa twee issa yights caye cans?"


*Translations:
'Grandpa! Grandma!'
'Wow, big truck! It's a garbage truck!'
'Christmas tree has lights and candy canes?'

Death by cute.

There are times when B just wants to be laid down so she can look around. Yesterday morning was one of those times, as she made it quite clear to us. So, Dave set her on her blanket by the tree.
Instantly, J flops down next to her and yells ("Baby!" Just in case we've forgotten, I suppose).
She reacts by squealing and cooing.
He laughs and squeals as well.
She laughs back.
He laughs.
She laughs.
He giggles and squeals.
She giggles--full out-loud baby giggles.
Dave and I stare in amazement and amusement as they continue for about thirty seconds, then we both scramble for our camera phones.
J gets bored, and gets up and leaves.

And this is why we need a webcam for Christmas.

I win!

B had her 4-month appointment today. She's 75% for height, and has slimmed down to 95% for weight. Silly chubby baby. In case you're wondering, I predicted 16.5 lb, Dave predicted 20. So, I was closer! She's 16 lb, 12 oz, and full of thigh & tummy rolls.
:p

Thanks, kid.

The following exchange happened as Dave walked with J from the car to the apartment:

D: "What do you see? Do you see snow?"
J: "I see so."
D: "Is the snow cold?"
J: "So code. Issa so white?"
D: "Yes, the snow is white. Do you see a wall?"
J: "See wall."
D: "Do you see a door?"
J: "See door."
D: "Do you see Mommy?"
J: "AAAAAHHHHH!"

*It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas*

We were "blessed" with a heavy dusting of snow at some point early this morning so everything is mostly white outside. I thought J would be intrigued by the change of scenery, so I opened the blinds this morning to reveal the small accumulation of snow to him. The following verbal transaction ensued:

Me: "Jonas look! What's out there? What do you see?"
J: *gasps* *smiles*
Me: "What do you see?"
J: *points* "Twuck!"
Me: "What's the white stuff? See? Look, everything is white."
J: "White."
Me: "Yeah, its called snow. Can you say 'snow'? .... Snow. ... Jonas, can you say 'snow'?"
J: "Issa kina white?"
Me: "Sure, its a kind of white. Its called 'snow'!"
J: "So!"
Me: "Yeah! Snow!"
J: "Twuck! Issa white twuck! Car. Issa white car!"
Me: *facepalm*

Not my child...

I forgot to post this when it happened, but here you go anyway:

At Game Club last week, J was getting antsy, so I let him lead me around the building. As we neared the information desk, he noticed the display of several flags hanging from the wall. Just as a couple male students walk past, J looks up and points. "Fag. Two fags!"
Much stifled snickering ensues.
"No, honey. There's [quick mental counting] fourteen flags up there."
He looks at me very earnestly. "Two fags."
"Okay, honey."

Heaven help us if he figures out they're candy...

Ahh, the holidays. J is old enough to realize that something's going on and it might be fun. Already, whenever we drive after 4 pm, he's pointing out the windows and yelling, "Yook! Yights!" "Yook! Yights twee!"
He loves the tree display at Walmart ("Yook! Twee yights!" "Twee balls!" "Ball! One ball. Two balls!" "Yook! Sar twee!"), and is perpetually sidetracked by the massive child-magnets called 'toy displays'. I swear, those things must have been designed by the Pied Piper of Hamelin, because J can find them from across the store.
We are enjoying his new vocabulary ("Pwesents!"), and he is enjoying the Christmas tree, particularly the candy canes. Curiously enough, the tree keeps losing all of said candy canes below about 3.5 feet.
Or, as J says every time he presents me with handfuls of pilfered decorations, "Caye cans!"